Many if not all of us have grown up with the saying “Silence is Golden” we were told on many occasions “keeping your tongue will save your life” and what about this famous one “Even a fool when he holdeth his tongue is counted as a wise man” how could I forget this one “What you see here when you come here let it remain here” and finally “What goes on behind close doors remains there” but what trouble is this, the phrases now coming what about “Do not carry your business on the street” and “What goes on in the family stays in the family” and “All talk is not good to talk”.

As a survivor of child abuse I kept all those phrases, and silence was not golden for me, keeping my tongue did not save my life, I was classed as unwise for breaking my silence, I wished those who came to the home and saw unhappiness did not allow it to remain there, I wished I was empowered and educated enough back then to have spoken out about what was going on behind close doors, reflecting now I wished I had carried it on the street, I had no family, for what was going on in the family was brutalization and abuse. I was living in a house which was not a home.

Many of these phrases and more kept me bound for many years dying inside, being lonely and alone.

LIFE LESSON LEARNT: Silence is not always golden and there comes a time when you need to use your voice to speak out, if what is going on behind closed doors are violations of a persons human rights and abuse you need to speak out, using your voice will save your life for it will release you from the pain and torment of the person oppressing you.

When I used my voice some people did not like it, some were amazed, some supported, some believed me but there were those who believed not, there may be many who still do not believe, I say to them your disbelief does not make the facts unreal, my pain less burdensome, the memory less taunting, and my violation less painful.

Your disbelief and fake accusations will not make me keep SILENT as a parent and guardian you failed in your duty to protect me and because I am breaking my silence you feel ashamed, you want persons to look at you as the model parent/guardian so instead of you keeping silent which will be golden for you, you are using your voice against the victim.

Today, someone reading this post may be experiencing the pain of silence now is the time to speak, now is the time to remove the gag order and free yourself from the secrets which you have carried, free yourself so you can grow and experience life and living. Silence is not always golden there are times when silence kills, and it kills generations.


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